Often times the biggest breakdown in companies, churches, and marriages is communication. Poor communication negatively affects everything else. Communication tends to break down because we all communicate differently.
Each personality style has their own unique way of communicating. When one style is communicating one way and another style is expecting them to communicate their way it creates chaos.
We must be aware of our own communication tendencies as well as the communication tendencies of others. Leaders will make the proper adjustments in their own communication. While some people, who refuse to adjust their communication, will just complain that nobody understands them.
What are the communication tendencies of each style?
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he security seeking style-The Hearts-are concrete communicators. This means they communicate very deductively. Tell them what you are going to tell them, tell them, then tell them what you told them. Hearts want to hear three steps and a conclusion. They understand what they can hear, physically feel, and taste. Hearts also need a connection of what you are saying to a person or a task. Hearts like to accomplish tasks and they like community. If you can connect what you are talking about to a specific task or to a group of people it becomes more meaningful to a heart.
The thrill-seeking style-The Bodies-are also concrete communicators. So, they also like things explained very deductively. Step one, step two, step three, and so on. However, the difference between the bodies and the Hearts is that Bodies need to enjoy the conversation. They need to be excited or drawn into what is being said. Create excitement and you have their attention
The identity seeking style-The Souls-are abstract communicators. They can often begin to daydream if the conversation becomes to deductive. They need to hear concepts and ideas as much or more than cold hard facts. With Souls, you sometimes do not have to say the point to make the point. A matter of fact, Souls often prefer to discover the point on their own. Souls are not much for meaningless chit-chat. They want their conversations to be meaningful and with a purpose.
The knowledge seeking style-The Minds-are also abstract communicators. They need concepts and ideas as much or more than cold hard facts. However, they also need to be stimulated mentally. If your conversations are shallow or “same old, same old” then you will lose the attention of a mind. They need to be mentally challenged. Also, if you are making any “out of the box” claims (a place Minds actually enjoy) you better be able to back it up. Minds are also not much for chit-chat. They prefer to get the point and see where the point takes them.
As you communicate with people at work, at church, with friends, or in your marriage. Try to identify the communication style of the person or people you are communicating with. Make the proper adjustments and you will begin to see drastic results.
What adjustments can you make in your next conversation?
After reading today’s blog, what personality style do you think you are? Comment below by clicking on “leave comment” and then at the end of the week, after reviewing each personality type in more detail, you can see if you were right!
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Tommy Lanham is a dynamic, award-winning speaker who has been training individuals and organizations to reach their God-given potential for 25 years. With a unique blend of Ziglar motivation and ragamuffin faith, Tommy delivers powerful, life changing messages filled with humor, hope, and enthusiasm.
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