What is the secret to a great marriage relationship? My wife and I have had our ups and downs over almost 17 years of marriage. Through it all, we have learned some valuable lessons to having a great marriage. We have had a whole lot of help along the way from marriage coaches, counselors, and mentors. They have all helped us to greatly improve our marriage relationships not to mention the many books, conferences, seminars, and retreats that have helped us as well. Through seventeen years of learning, failing, learning from failing and eventually experiencing some successes, here are what I consider the top four most important secrets of a great marriage.
- The first secret to a great marriage relationship is for both people to keep their eyes on Jesus. Jesus must be the focus. He is the most important factor of any great relationship.
- Good Communication. Open and honest communication going both ways. The better the communication, the better the relationship.
My wife and I attended a retreat in 2014, that dramatically helped us in both areas. We pray not only with each other every night (even nights when one of us is away) but for each other every night. We also learned a communication tool called “dialogue” (I describe this practice here) that has greatly improved our communication. Our prayer time and our “dialogue” has not only kept us focused on Jesus and communication it has helped us continue to grow and improve in both of those areas. Jesus and communication would defiantly be my top two most important aspects of a great marriage relationship.
- Having a shared purpose, values, and goals. This is another area where my wife and I have dramatically grown over the course of seventeen years. We have discovered that when we dream together we grow together.
- In my opinion, there is one more important secret to a great marriage…an extremely hot sex life! There, I said it. I know many of you were thinking it, so, I just went ahead and said it.
Each couple may define a “hot sex life” differently. This may depend on what stage of your life or marriage you are in or even your health and many other factors. That is OK, as long as you and your spouse define it together. Keep in mind that “hot” is not necessarily determined by frequency. It is more determined by the love, passion, and even spirituality that is shared through the sexual relationship. Regardless of how you define it, an extremely hot sex life frequently makes for a great marriage relationship.
What are your secrets for a great marriage relationship?
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Tommy Lanham is a dynamic, award-winning speaker who has been training individuals and organizations to reach their God-given potential for 25 years. With a unique blend of Ziglar motivation and ragamuffin faith, Tommy delivers powerful, life changing messages filled with humor, hope, and enthusiasm.
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